The Rooster Strikes Again!

OK, so I updated the picture slideshow at the top of this page to a rotating cube. I really like it, but the fact that it's not centered is pissing me off. The code is set to align="middle" but it's just not working. So if you have a suggestion, let me know. If not, you'll have to deal with it just like me.

Labels: advice, boredom

Posted by Rooster at 10:00 PM | Permalink | Comments

Last night I was watching the news and they were talking about 5 people in the Stanwood, WA area that was hit by lightning during our storm last night. 5 PEOPLE! Holy crap. Anyway, that is not what I'm focusing on here.

During the news cast, they were saying a non-profit organization is going through a Thunder & Lightning Safety Awareness excercise. The "best advice" was "to avoid getting struck by lightning, just watch out for thunderstorms".

Uh... what? OK.

Well, with that said, I guess I understand why this organization is "non-profit". They are so obvious that no one would pay them a dime.

So, in honor of what I will call "Captain Obvious Safety Awareness", I decided to add a few safety notices myself. Maybe I can get paid for all my hard work here, multiplying their effectiveness to a wide range of safety issues.

• To avoid getting carjacked, watch out for carjackers.
• To avoid getting getting VD, watch out for people with diseases prior to sleeping with them.
• To avoid getting in a car accident, watch out for cars (or fast approaching telephone polls) that are about to hit you .
• To avoid getting stuck in a hostage situation, don't walk into a building that is full of people tied up with guns to their heads by guys with ski masks on.
• To avoid becoming dumber by the minute, don't watch Dr. Phil.
• To avoid drowning, keep water out of your lungs.
• To avoid falling from a tree, don't climb it.
• To avoid getting bit by a dog, don't piss him off.

OK, I think I've given you enough advice that you can learn and live by, allowing you to stay alive for a little while longer.

Disclaimer: If, while reading any of my safety precautions above, you had an epiphone... then this is solid proof that evolution has been proven WRONG.

Labels: advice, evolution proven wrong, jackassery, useless info

Posted by Rooster at 11:39 AM | Permalink | Comments

Phase 2 of Project Passat has been completed!

- Bilstein Sport Shocks
- H & R springs, dropping 1.75" in the front, 1.5" in the rear

It makes such a difference. It's like I'm driving on rails. After I got the alignment, I took the car for a test drive on a certain road that has all sorts of weaves, turns, corners, and of course, never any cops. It's actually a private business road that for some crazy reason is not closed and can be access by anyone. Anyway, let's just say that I was taking those turns anywhere between 60-75 mph, barely even getting any body roll/sway. There still was some, so I think that just means Project Passat Phase 2.1 will be coming around shortly: Front and rear sway bars.

After that will be Phase 3. This will be some engine work. An APR chip upgrade, new diverter valve, and depending on funds after buying this house I am in the process of, a downpipe and cat-back exhaust.

Anyway, here are the new pics:

Labels: the good things in life

Posted by Rooster at 6:53 PM | Permalink | Comments

Identity thieves think they are so smart. Well, this story proves them wrong. They were phishing for personal information and apparently someone knew what was going on and decided to mess with them.

How, you ask?

The "phishing victim" went to the phishing site and entered:

First Name: Herman
Last Name: Munster
Address: 1313 Mocking Bird Lane
Birthdate: Aug. 15, 1964
Credit Card Number: Fake

Here is the news article

Labels: irony, jackassery

Posted by Rooster at 12:06 PM | Permalink | Comments

So, I never saw Ghost Rider in the theater, so I decided to pick it up. First things's first: Pay attention to the price of the DVD! I bought several items with it, so it slipped past me. Apparently the DVD, not even being HD or a bundle pack, was $35.00!!!

I won't go into details about the movie, but I will tell you it sucked. It was very open-ended and had a cheesy plot line that didn't follow the comic book very much at all, and the CG was pretty tacky.

Save the 123 minutes of your life and the $35 in your wallet and go get yourself a steak and a few drinks, or maybe even a cheap hooker if you can't get any for free. At least this way you'll walk away happy. Unless the hooker had crabs or something. In that case, you should have just bought the DVD. Dumbass.

Labels: advice

Posted by Rooster at 9:22 PM | Permalink | Comments

Good ol' Seattle gets some good stories. My fiance passed this one on to me and I felt it had to be shared.

Basically, some dude and his girlfriend got pulled over from driving eratically in a Seattle suburb. The trooper walks up to find both of them naked. They were gettin it on while driving. Oh, and there were some bottles in the back to.

So this story uncovers that there is a law calling "embracing while driving" a misdemeanor. I did not know that...

You can read the full story here.

Labels: cars, jackassery, the good things in life

Posted by Rooster at 10:54 AM | Permalink | Comments

So, getting ready for the PNW sponsored Drive to Leavenworth (this is an annual charity event where all the VWs, Audis, BMWs, and Porsches make a road trip to Eastern Washington) , I wanted to get suspension for my Passat, so I found the "best deal" for Bilstein shocks on Autozone.

Ya, I know you guys are probably already snickering at this one. I've never ordered from them before so I didn't know how moronic they are.

So, 7 days after ordering the shocks (also getting my H&R springs seperately from Futrell Autowerks), FedEx drops the packages at my house. I was expecting 2 boxes, one being the front shocks and the other being the rear.

My first indication that something was wrong was that one of the boxes was 2'x2'x6". Hmm... those front shocks must huge!

I opened the big box to find a radiator for a Honda.

I opened the other box and found one rear shock. Just one.

WTF?!?! Lesson learned: Never order from Autozone, they suffer from what I call jackassery.

So, I'm freaking out because I already have an appointment on Saturday to have them installed.

Since I just had great customer service from Futrell Autowerks, I called Aaron to see if there was any way they could get them in by Friday night. Aaron made a few calls, then called me back with great news.

The shocks will be in tomorrow night, by 5:30.

My highest regards to Futrell. They just secured business with me for life. Nice work Futrell. Cheers to you.



Update: To top everything off, I took the radiator and the ONE shock back to a local Autozone store so I could get my money back immediately and not have to deal with the return shipping. Here is what the manager said:

1) "I don't know what I'm going to do with this radiator. Wanna sell it? We have no record that you have this."
2) "Autozone.com always does **** like this. I can't believe it, I deal with this at least 5 times a week."
3) (Last but definitely not least) "Don't ever shop at Autozone. The website, here, or any other store. This company sucks. I'm just here for the paycheck."

I ended up getting the rest of my shocks at about 12:30 today. Now it's just time for installation, aka Project Passat, Phase 2!

Labels: idiots, jackassery, the good things in life

Posted by Rooster at 4:03 PM | Permalink | Comments

So, most of us know that I'm getting married in less than a year (countdown is at 340 days as I write this blog). As the soon-to-be-married-guy that will be paying for my own wedding, I keep my eye out for good deals (thanks Cranky Monkey for the hook up on photography!).

Good deals are good deals, but sometimes, they are at major expenses such as this "new offer". Nothing says poor-ass-redneck like a faux (fake) wedding cake.

Click here for the full article.

Labels: evolution proven wrong, jackassery

Posted by Rooster at 1:03 PM | Permalink | Comments

Well, it's official. Project Passat has kicked off. I got my new wheels today. They are 18" Privat Netz and I have to say, I freakin love 'em. It's amazing how much of a difference wheels make on a car. In fact, I'll show you the difference here with a "before" and "after" picture:

Before


After:


The first picture isn't the best quality, but you get the idea.

If you look closely, you'll also notice that took off the God-forsaken mudflaps. If you own a VW that has ever had mudflaps, you will understand the frustration. They scrape on everything, and loudly. So those little bastards are gone now.

I also de-badged my car so that it doesn't say Passat on it anymore. It's not that I don't like the name Passat, it's just that it looks much cleaner without the emblem. Here's another pic:



So, now that Phase 1 is complete, it's time to quickly move to Phase 2: Suspension. I'll be placing the order tonight for Bilstein shocks and Neuspeed springs, droppin' it 1.5 inches and what I like to call "curb mockery". If you like to drive like me or any of my buddies that drive euro's, you know exactly what curb mockery is.

Until next time.

Labels: cars, the good things in life

Posted by Rooster at 7:20 PM | Permalink | Comments

This morning I get up and get ready for work. Once I'm ready to go, I step outside and have my morning cigarette before I go fight the traffic. As I'm smoking my cancer stick, I notice my front license plate is missing a screw. Just one. The thing is the screws, as you can tell by looking at the picture below, need the cap popped off and then unscrewed to be removed. That doesn't just happen. That means someone actually made the effort to steel just one screw/cap combo from my license. Who does that?! Seriously?!



So, I called VW to find out if I could by just the one screw replacement, or even all four. Anything to avoid paying almost $30 for a whole frame. Nope. Notta. Gotta buy the whole damn thing.

Labels: jackassery, sand in your vagina

Posted by Rooster at 3:12 PM | Permalink | Comments